How Not to Sell Anything
Table of Contents
The best of American marketing-speak. 3
Sales and marketing
In my time as a college lecturer, specialising in international trade – I did countless sessions focused on Export Sales and Marketing.
Which meant that I had to keep up to date with developments in the area and particularly the increasing use of an internet-based sales function – which also contributed to the more sophisticated collection and analysis of information by research companies who made their revenue from advising companies how they might improve their sales techniques.
Now, this may seem to be pretty boring – but in fact it was highly amusing. Particularly when the actual language used in advertising and by salespeople making a pitch – was the subject of the research.
We can all have the opinion, that lots of this sales/marketing -speak is just jargon and – let’s be honest – mostly bull**it. But I have the research that not only proves that it is – but also suggests that a lot of it actually loses potential customers, rather than attracts them.
Jargon or Cliches
There is a fine dividing line between the necessary jargon used between specialists who understand it, which describes technical properties or processes, where plain English is inadequate –
-and the repetition of muchover- used phrases which are bland and trite – and actually don’t say much at all.
One research project actually built a list of cliches which had the measurable effect of annoying and frustrating a potential buyer to the point of them deciding they didn’t want to do business with this individual or their company – an opinion which seemed to be permanent.
The Worst Cliches – (to be avoided)
Let’s touch base.
Circle the wagons.
Let’s get our ducks in a row.
We have to raise the bar.
Go the extra mile
Move the needle
Let’s peel the onion.
From the ground up.
Outside the box.
We haven’t got the bandwidth for …..
- And often just two or even one word –
Paradigm shift
Core Competency
Solutions driven.
Big picture
Game changer
Cutting edge
Epic
Leverage
Transformative
Holistic
Viral
Impactful
I think we would all benefit from avoiding their use.
But, of course – some more complex language can be used and can be laughable to the point of embarrassing.
This is particularly the case with American origin examples of marketing-speak– of which a colleague and started a small collection.
The best of American marketing-speak. –
‘Let’s hoist it up the flagpole – and see who salutes.’
Drop it on the stoop and see if the cat licks it up.’ (stoop – an outside decking)
My favourite –
‘hand me my crosscut saw, I’m going out on a limb.’
At least they’re funny – although not intended to be.