The European Parliament
Nice breakfast and a civilised departure at 10.30 and at the Parliament check in for 11.00 – bang on time.
Security check – photo ID passes distributed to everyone – all very efficient.
Met by a visitor’s service host, greets us and leads us to what looks like a film set with a large staircase like stage which leads up to a display of all the flags of the member nations.
Bill and I had done this before – but you could see some of the students thought it was jaw dropping – and it gets better.
We are asked to arrange ourselves on the stage with roughly the tallest at the back and the shortest at the front -plus the group leaders front centre.
Then the photographer arrives – sets up and then gets a few people to swop to ensure that everybody’s face is seen in the picture – click click-click and we are done.
Follow the host to a presentation room -every table with its own microphones and headphones linked to the interpretation service –which, for major procedural meetings, like the Parliament in session, covers 24 languages.
Everybody seated and then two staff circulate handing a printed card to everyone which, in English, gives the website address and password to access the digital photograph just taken. Impressive or what?
Then our sponsoring MEP appears – Eddie Newman, then MEP for central Manchester.
Gives me and Bill a thumbs up – we have met quite a few times.
He does about half an hour – introducing himself – his background a(mostly Post Office Union – as he called it) and what we will see in the session and taking questions – we had planted three when on the coach and picked some volunteers – so that filled the time fine.
Then he is off to earn his money – and we are given a spread of tea, coffee and biscuits, and then led into the observation balcony of the Parliament Chamber – all seated on the two front rows.
Obviously, an impressive interior – mikes and headphones at every seat and filling up with MEPs – looks like a good turnout compared with some previous visits, we do know that today is primarily a voting day rather than a debating day – so unlikely to be any fist fights.
Eddy had told the group that the assembly is not organised in countries i.e. all the French sitting together etc. – but in political affiliations.
Still uses the concept of right and left wing as in the UK Parliament – so to the right of the Chair are the Fascists (yes, they are a party) then as you sweep around the amphitheatre type layout – gradually moving though centre right parties (e.g. UK Conservatives) onto centre parties (e.g. UK liberal Democrats) to centre left and finally the large and diverse Socialist grouping (with UK Labour) and ending up – directly opposite the Fascists are the Far left Communists.
Nationalities being, in theory, irrelevant – but in practice, national interests will always play a part.
There were/are, also a number of independents who sit alone on the relatively empty back row.
On an earlier visit we had seen Ian Paisley sat there all by himself.
His problem was – as the larger the group the more talking time they get allocated in debates – so he probably got about ten minutes every other month (I’m only guessing, but it wouldn’t be much!).
We were told that the Chair can switch any members microphone off, if they exceed their allocated time – with orange and then red warning lights before they are cut off.
He apparently just kept on talking until escorted out.
The Proceedings
In a relatively full Chamber – the Chair (who Eddy has said was a woman often picked when a series of votes were taken – some quite quickly – as being able to control it and mastered the electronic vote recording system.
We had already advised the group to use the headphones and tune in to the English interpreters, of course.
That is fascinating – for about half an hour.
The English in particular – because they were concentrating so hard, lapsed into a monotonous drone.
The fact is that with instantaneous interpretation they have to get it right first time –
and each of them in a team of three has to cover three different languages and switch immediately if needed –
and in some languages, notably German, the object of a sentence often comes at the end, so the interpreter has to wait for it to make sense of the sentence – so, listening, you get a few words and then silence, for a number of seconds – long enough for you to check you headphone connection and plug it in again – and then you get a hasty catch up.
We did suggest to the group, to stick to English unless it got really boring and then for a bit of interest, switch to Italian.
as the English got more and more monotonous – the Italians did the exact opposite and got more and more hysterical!
Even with the most boring speeches – it increasingly sounded like extra time between AC Milan and Inter – Milan in the San Siro stadium – and you could find the Italian interpreters pretty easily, as, in the big Chambers – like the Parliament, the glass fronted booths are visible from the audience – and they were the ones who had arms waving everywhere and often jumped to their feet and sat down again.
As once described by one our English visitor’s services contacts – ‘they do three hours and then they carry them out in a bucket’.
My favourite anecdote about the interpreters – which I like to believe – is an MEP speaker saying what should have been interpreted as ‘traditional Gallic common sense’
But the English translation it came out as – ‘Norman Wisdom’.
Well, it should be true.
Each proposal up for vote was proposed and seconded by the relevant MEPs and the electronic voting was slick – made the UK Parliament look ancient – walking through the lobby and the ‘Ayes have it’ stuff.
MEPS vote by pressing a button from their seat – the vote is automatically counted in seconds and updated on the huge graphic display above the Speaker – takes about 2 minutes from beginning to end. Which explains why they could get through up to ten full votes an hour, if needed.
So not a heated debate but, all of it still very revealing about the workings of the European Parliament.
Highlight for me – when we first sat down, a number of Commissionaires, from Brussels – were taking their prominent front row positions – including Neil Kinnock and his wife, Glynis (also a Commissioner) – in a very natty red number – Glynis that is.
Before we leave – given details for the dinner to be hosted by Eddy – same as last time – suits us and he /EU are paying.
Back to the hotel, for about 16.00 – time to chill out – leaving for dinner at 19.00 – remembering that tomorrow we are hitting the road back to Zeebrugge and then home.
Hosted dinner
Courtesy of Eddie Newman – well, the EU budget!
Found the restaurant right on time – John, the driver – faultless again. Eddy just arrived and our table – a single one for 37 diners, all laid and ready. He obviously spends a lot of somebody else’s money there.
Excellent three course meal with wine in a very lively place. When the full Parliament is in town – Strasbourg is buzzing. Nye sits at the top of the table next to Eddie – so still on the job. He also does a brief formal thank you. Glad we brought him now – Bill and I can just sit back now and again.
All safely back to the hotel and most looking knackered by now. We don’t even bother the bar – just off to bed.
Tomorrow, Friday – remember?
Straight run to Zeebrugge – five hours at the most, and then heading home – but let’s not get cocky, just yet.
Friday – last day
Feels like the last day of a month-long trip.
At least it’s not an early start – Zeebrugge, late afternoon will be fine
We leave about 11.00 and John has time to do one of his party pieces.
One of the reasons that Strasbourg was selected as the location for the main Parliament assembly – was the fact that it was historically half French, half German – sitting right on the border and changing hands over the centuries. Now absolutely part of France.
It was also the capital of the Alsace region in the centre of the Ruhr coalfields and steel works.
Which made it the logical location for the very first Community which evolved into the current European Union – The European Coal and Steel Community –
Treaty of Paris 1951 – just six years after the end of the Second World War and dedicated to avoiding a Third.
France happy to host – Germany – no choice.
You have to admit that and more recent EU developments – have done that job perfectly for over 70 years – but they were in no position to prevent the Russian, 2022 crisis.
Visit to Germany
So – John’s trick – he drives the twenty minutes to the German border – on the river Ill (that’s ILL) where it meets the Rhine.
Parks up, on the French side and we all leave the coach to do the five minute’s walk across the bridge into a very pleasant small village, in Germany – now we have visited five different countries –
England
Belgium
Luxembourg
France
Germany
Bill and I had been there with groups before the introduction of The Single Market – which meant that an internal Customs post was still there.
We used asked two of our ladies to go in, smiling. and ask if they would stamp some passports for people to say they had been to Germany. Never got refused, the Customs officer must have been bored rigid, and those that wanted to, got ta stamp.
That was it, nothing much else to see now – so, back on the coach and hit the road for Zeebrugge.
Zeebrugge
Uneventful journey – one stop at a service for fuel/food and drink and comfort break.
Bill and I do our trick – we nip to the shop to find appropriate prizes for the prepared EU quiz we have – based on everything they have/ should have, learnt this week – which we do on the coach to pass the time.
Got about20 strings of ten fruit lollipops – enough for all of them in pairs i.e. – can’t have any losers. – they mark their own answers anyway’
We’re off again – give them the news of the quiz – few initial groans but when we say there are prizes, they get more interested – we haven’t told them what the prizes are, of course, and get them to sort into pairs.
An aside – no surprise for us – at the start we have free seating from the college. Apart from the two front rows, which are reserved for me, Bill and Nye, in this case– we need access to the PA and video – they sit where they like. There are still about 16 free seats -if anybody wants to sit alone. But mostly they end up roughly with a bunch of their classmates – they do know their faces, and many might already be mates.
In fact – one year, having already allocated places for the next trip – –at the end of a class, just sorting my papers – I am approached by a couple of students, booked on the next trip – a lad and girl, who say they are partners in the real world and could they share the double accommodation on the trip.
No reason to even question it – ‘of course you can – no problem’.
We are not ‘in loco parentis’ – in fact I would avoid that like the plague -I don’t have the skill set for that.
Back to Seating habits – human nature – the seats they take on departure mostly, stay the same throughout the week – like they’re reserved. Very few occasions that somebody switches, unless its to have a kip on the back seat – all seats recline anyway. I can’t actually remember a serious fall out on any trip
Back to the quiz.
They pair up very easily – we distribute blank postcards and pens if needed (they are students!) to write down their answers but – don’t intend to make it too competitive or embarrass anyone – so they can mark their own – on their honour.
On the PA – got fifty questions if we need them – but usually look to probably a duration of 30 minutes – maybe ten more if they are up for it.
No heavy questions. Try to keep it light-hearted but do cover every day’s activity one way or the other.
Scores on the doors -just count down from all correct – depending on number of questions asked, obviously. But don’t look to find the worst, and there are often matching scores – just find a point where we can name a winner or winners – then say ‘well, everyone has done so well – you all get a prize’ and the lollipops are distributed – one string/roll per pair.
Maybe a distracting hour, from start to finish and we have moved on, probably 70+ kilometres, closer to Zeebrugge.
Zeebrugge
North Sea Ferries, here we come – again.
Arrive a bit early – time for a drink and a chill
Everything normal – and pretty quiet Our party actually called for check in first – looks like we are still VIPs. Boarding cards distributed and an easy boarding – cabins all ready, and weather forecast, good.
Let’s go home.
Sail on time and meet up, ‘for a change! in the main bar. Lots of room – looks like North Sea Ferries may still be paying for the strike, and a full staff on -including a disco .
Bill and I team up with Nye and John and our usual fan club and just starting to really relax.
We discussed it – same for both of us, we didn’t realise how tense we had been, even now. But now there is nothing for us to do. Other people’s jobs to get us to Manchester.
Bill getting picked up at the motorway service we always stop at, about one hour out of Manchester, for calls to confirm collection times.
I’ve got a car parked at the college and home in 30-40 minutes – and that’s all tomorrow.
I get myself a Campari & soda – might seem strange, but that’s my favoured holiday aperitif – and now, I’m off duty – on holiday – for a while.
Off for our last communal dinner – I’m even fed up with the fish and chips now – go for the sausage and mash – I’ve had a lot worse.
Relatively quiet night – dance floor nowhere near full – small numbers and a bunch of knackered students.
DJ just settled for smooth, relaxing sounds – no more Wig Wam Bam.
I actually did OK with half an hour on a Blackjack table.
Nobody up for a late night – even the younger ones – no stamina nowadays.
Nice calm crossing and a good night’s sleep.
Feeling better in the morning and sounds like we are berthing on time.
Easy disembark and John ready and waiting with the coach.
All accounted for and we are off for a fast run on the M62.
Don’t need the PA or the videos – do remember to collect mine back.
Only one Job – a collection for John – he has certainly earned it.
One of the girls ’s is volunteered (we did ask her before we did) to take the bag around –
I remind them that he is happy with foreign currency as well as Sterling.
Bag comes back – couldn’t count it exactly – but I’ll bet we have topped the equivalent of £40 – knowing that Bill, Nye and me had put a fiver each in.
Had asked the girl to present it to John with a peck on his cheek – very well done.
Even driving in, John is on the PA thanking everyone and saying it had been one of the most interesting trips he has ever had.
One way to put it, I suppose
Gets a good round of applause.
Bill picked up at the services – rest into Manchester – arrive at the college about 13.00 Saturday, as predicted.
– Everybody seemed to be sorted – lots of goodbyes – I’ll see a lot of them next on Monday and Tuesday!
Nye finds his car and I find mine – solid handshake and even a brief hug and a ‘well done and thank you for asking me’ – he’s actually enjoyed it!
I’m home in about 40 minutes – my wife works from home and have kept in touch during the morning – lunch if I want it now.
Change first from what I regard as casual but working clothes to my normal ‘chill out and don’t give a toss.’ outfit.
Finally relax, and happy with a difficult job well done – and I still have a job!
Back to the day job on Monday.