Guangzhou Chapter 3
Table of Contents
Fri 16th First day of course. 1
Fri 16 First day of course
09.00 start.
08.00 – carefully set up laptop and projector in the training room – in T shirt and shorts – in front of 8 delegates who had arrived very early.
Then off for a quick shower and change. On my return, I discover that A had arrived and, in my absence, moved the projector ( after I had taken ½ hour setting it up perfectly square -I am a bit OCD about it, and he had arranged eight chairs in just the right place for the honoured guests.
So had to set up again – he just watched me!
VIPs arrive – intro went well – press were there– cameras everywhere –photos of everybody shaking everything with everybody. I find out later that we did make the local papers – I’ve got some fan mail somewhere.
Course Begins.
We have, surprisgly, nineteen delegates – so first possible problem i.e. only two turning up, has been avoided.
But – pretty quickly, turns into a nightmare!
A had sat by the side and slightly behind me, (which I did think was rather strange)– but 19 delegates sat watching – so couldn’t really question him.
I start my introduction i.e. introducing me – few minutes, and he is on his feet, almost talking over me, loudly presenting something in Chinese!
After a few minutes of this, he sits down and waves me to carry on.
I suddenly realise that he is translating me into Chinese, whilst trying to guess when I have actually finished a sentence.
I had no idea until he stood up and took over.
Done without discussing it with me in advance or, in fact, at all, and let’s be honest, we have had days and days of basically just passing time – plenty of time to talk.
In other circumstances I would have called a halt and/or just abandoned the course. But nineteen delegates who have all, travelled here and hopefully, paid – and the consequences to them, as well as me – I still want to get home! I gave it another two hours, just to get to a tea break – and then intend to have a fist-fight with A.
He continues chirping in, not only severely disrupting my timing, but – two of the delegates fell asleep (must have had an early start!)
Stagger on as far as I can into an early tea break _ I don’t have a clue, of course, about what he is saying.
No time for tea. I am beyond politeness.
I say to A – ‘what the hell do you think you are doing! Heated discussions with A and his gang, behind closed doors. They seem to miss the point, which I quickly made clear ( I was really annoyed now) i.e. me having been assured that all the delegates would have good English, and all the presentations were to be in English – and delegate notes and PowerPoints are in English – they have obviously enrolled delegates whose English is inadequate – and they knew it –driven, no doubt, by course fee revenue issues, but they didn’t tell me – Their only response is shrugged shoulders.
They do, slowly but eventually, seem to realise that I was not happy to continue with the present set up and – that I had the opinion that they had lied to me and not been honest in planning that A would interrupt and translate without any prior discussion with me. These are serious charges in China, and- I think I made it clear that I was capable of just walking out – though I was a bit apprehensive about them calling my bluff and me getting out of there and home.
They did seem to start to understand the gravity of the situation and became a little more responsive.
However, their only options – can we introduce more activity – such as? – physical activities, deep breathing and stretches, games, role play – how about music? Realise that we still have a big problem.
My short-term solution – for the afternoon session,
A presents, in Chinese, the export payment risk unit (in the programme but later in the course) – he is, allegedly, an ex-banker.
He does appear to fill about two hours and seems to answer some questions but doesn’t use the PowerPoint show for that unit at all – of course I have no way to assess the validity of whatever he was saying.
But, with another longish break, we get past 4 pm – and there seems to be no problem with the group hitting the road for the day (the Chinese rush hour is apocalyptic).
Whole gang back to my room again – I think we are trying come up with some ways to save the course. They seem to be remarkably laid back about everything.
I suggest – I still have a day, on Presentation Skills, which I could stretch to a day and a half and believe I can present without translation – minimal technical language and scope for role-play.
We have two more – what you might call, ‘technical’ units i.e. ‘Contract Term’s and ‘Getting Paid’ – and A could pick and mix what he was comfortable with from the ‘getting psid’ and deliver a Chinese version.
This would require him to refresh his memory of the English course content in the delegate notes and I would give him my laptop this evening, with the PowerPoint show, to again let him familiarise himself and a least get a few graphics in, in the right order. He assures me that he is comfortable with PowerPoint.
We have a plan.
Then- just when I think we might survive and want to get my head straight in my room – I am informed that dinner has been booked, for A, by his best mate –ex Sergeant Major, British Army HK now a delegate on the course – (let’s call him SM) and me – in a special restaurant – authentic Cantonese. Just about the very last thing I wanted to hear.
I needed some food and hoped I could talk some sense to them face to face. So, dragged reluctantly to dinner
I am still not sure if they appreciate the possible consequences of the situation, and maybe over the dinner table is a way of marking their card. A seems to respect his mate’s opinion – him being – allegedly – an ex-senior officer in the UK army.
I did launch into an eyeball to eyeball – ‘
Ignoring the fact that they have, essentially set a trap for me – despite the fact that we have had days of basically doing nothing when it should obviously have been discussed.
The facts are – If the course collapses with delegate walk outs or no shows tomorrow, then not only do they lose their revenue (I have no idea if any delegates had paid in advance- but if they quit they will not pay at all) but also A and his team, would then not be able to pay the IoE’s copyright, and presentation fees and expenses – and the IoE, as a UK registered charity, would have no choice but to take legal action to recover their costs and unpaid fees as required by the UK Charity Commission regulations.
(OK –a bit of bull – but needs must).
Appropriate, I think, on the grounds that – (you’re getting there now) – I might not get paid– for what has been, up to now, the most stressful training job I have ever done – and still more to come.
I rested my case.
Snake and Tortoise
To add insult to injury – the dinner specials were – snake and boiled tortoise – this is not a joke! – I even had to pick my tortoise from the tank – picked the smallest.
The snake was OK actually.
For those of you thinking that I should be refusing such offerings – it is a tricky one –there are considerations:
- In many countries, particularly where food is not plentiful and not cheap, a refusal to eat local food when offered, is often taken as an insult to the country and the person offering it– and China is definitely one of those countries.
- Also – There may be nothing else to eat.
- In training seminars, I suggest that, if they want to get orders, they go along with it as best they can – you don’t have to eat it all -just make an effort.
Having done my research, I expected a cuisine which was different from a UK version of what we still call, Cantonese food. in fact, I got something very different.
The background is that, historically, Canton, down on the south coast and a long way from power in the north, in Peking, got very little government support and was left to its own devices.
This did have the advantage of allowing Canton to eventually, without interference, develop into an international trading port culminating in the lucrative tea trade with the west from the 18th century.
However, it did struggle to be self-sufficient, particularly with food. Hence – most protein that moved was eaten, one way or the other. Virtually nothing edible was thrown away.
A good example – on another project requiring a visit to Singapore – I was taken to a very nice Chinese restaurant. Ordered aromatic crispy duck as a starter, as did some others in our party.
Quite a ceremony – whole ducks are brought to the table and Skinned. All the crispy skin peeled off and sliced into pieces.
Skin, with sliced spring onion and cucumber and Hoi Sin sauce- then presented on a central platter, and duck meat taken away.
I am by now just following the example of others – by taking some skin and filling with the onion, cucumber and sauce – rolling it up and eating it. It was OK.
I felt obliged to ask, ‘What happens to the duck meat’?
‘That will be shredded and served with noodles as the next course’
- and, that’s genuine Cantonese!
Finally managed to persuade A and SM, that I had prep to do for tomorrow, and A certainly did, –and I eventually get back to my room.